If a guy, let say sort of your ex, asked you to do something which according to your moral standard was sexually inappropriate, would you do it? For old time sake, would you do things against your common sense just to keep the friendship going? Now here's the thing, since you were probably confused by now, let me tell you why did I ask those questions. A few years back I met a guy who was kind of caught my attention and we went out few times. My mistake completely as back then I was actually with someone and failed to mention it to him (read my blog : My Holiday In Goa). But, after a while and passed some feuds and arguments, now we decided to be friends. For me, really not a big deal at all as I was totally had fun with him back then so yea, what's in past stayed in the past. And over my naivety I thought he has the same thoughts as mine. Did he?
Nope. So here's the thing, a couple of weeks ago, after losing tract for a year or so, out of sudden he contacted me again. This was a surprise as we were kind of keeping a distant between us because of his previous girlfriend didn't really approve our friendship and for some reasons I was always got blamed for their personal matters. So of course, when he text me again, I was gladly response. I was so happy that he then decided to forget all of the stupid things that happened in the past and offer me our friendship back. Feel like winning a lottery I took the offer and we suddenly became best buddies all over again. I found myself talk to him almost everyday now and yea..hate to admit it, but I do miss our old time mischievous conversations so bad. But when the conversations get too intense and he asked me to do something which according to my standard was inappropriate, of course, I politely refused. Then as you guys guessed, yeah..we had those kind of arguments all over again. I mean, am a kind of girl who found that it was difficult to just say 'NO' to others. Instead, I lied and created some excuses to (according to my thoughts) make him believes. My bad. As he knew my tricks already so of course he knew exactly when I was lie and when I was not. So no matters how I tried to convinced him, he was way too smart now..ha! So yeah, the history repeated itself and he called me a liar just like old time all over again. Déjà vu!
But, my question is, should I feel guilty here? I mean, to be honest with you guys, I probably still have this tiny spot in my heart for him as he was actually the last person whom I can say that am in love with, so of course the tense is still pretty much there. I still see the firecrackers whenever I dream of him and just by thinking about him already give me rush. But the thing is, my common sense told me that the thing between us back then was more like a passion than a love. There were no strings attached whatsoever. But I did love him back then, still do maybe..and I know, it was totally my fault for everything that happened, but hey..they said average person lied 3-9 times a day, so yeah..am kind of normal then, right? Ha!
Now, back to my question, if a guy, short of your ex, asked you to do something which according to your standard was sexually inappropriate and you refused to do so hence an argument, should you take the blame for it? Because honestly, am not afraid to be blamed. I mean, if I did something wrong, I will more than happy to take the blame and apologize. So, should I apologize to him for failed to accommodated his wish? Probably I should apologize to him but not for that reason. Probably I should ask him to forgive me for giving him a wrong impression about me and leading him towards a wrong direction that made him did whatever he's done. Yeah, that's more like it.
Nope. So here's the thing, a couple of weeks ago, after losing tract for a year or so, out of sudden he contacted me again. This was a surprise as we were kind of keeping a distant between us because of his previous girlfriend didn't really approve our friendship and for some reasons I was always got blamed for their personal matters. So of course, when he text me again, I was gladly response. I was so happy that he then decided to forget all of the stupid things that happened in the past and offer me our friendship back. Feel like winning a lottery I took the offer and we suddenly became best buddies all over again. I found myself talk to him almost everyday now and yea..hate to admit it, but I do miss our old time mischievous conversations so bad. But when the conversations get too intense and he asked me to do something which according to my standard was inappropriate, of course, I politely refused. Then as you guys guessed, yeah..we had those kind of arguments all over again. I mean, am a kind of girl who found that it was difficult to just say 'NO' to others. Instead, I lied and created some excuses to (according to my thoughts) make him believes. My bad. As he knew my tricks already so of course he knew exactly when I was lie and when I was not. So no matters how I tried to convinced him, he was way too smart now..ha! So yeah, the history repeated itself and he called me a liar just like old time all over again. Déjà vu!
But, my question is, should I feel guilty here? I mean, to be honest with you guys, I probably still have this tiny spot in my heart for him as he was actually the last person whom I can say that am in love with, so of course the tense is still pretty much there. I still see the firecrackers whenever I dream of him and just by thinking about him already give me rush. But the thing is, my common sense told me that the thing between us back then was more like a passion than a love. There were no strings attached whatsoever. But I did love him back then, still do maybe..and I know, it was totally my fault for everything that happened, but hey..they said average person lied 3-9 times a day, so yeah..am kind of normal then, right? Ha!
Now, back to my question, if a guy, short of your ex, asked you to do something which according to your standard was sexually inappropriate and you refused to do so hence an argument, should you take the blame for it? Because honestly, am not afraid to be blamed. I mean, if I did something wrong, I will more than happy to take the blame and apologize. So, should I apologize to him for failed to accommodated his wish? Probably I should apologize to him but not for that reason. Probably I should ask him to forgive me for giving him a wrong impression about me and leading him towards a wrong direction that made him did whatever he's done. Yeah, that's more like it.
^_^
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