Sunday, December 27, 2009

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Saturday, December 19, 2009

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Wednesday, December 9, 2009

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Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Chain Letter

British are famous for having a sarcastic sense of humor. Unlike American, their sense of humor are more bitter and more cynical. Some people even think that British are sharp speaking people, but for me, I love British humor. So funny and this one that am going to tell you is no different.
Here is the thing, since this digital era started, with internet and mobile phones things, now we can easily connected with everyone around the globe. People are using those media to send anything nowadays. Letters, greeting cards, invitations, text messages, anything. And out of sudden this chain letter phenomenon came. Seriously guys, I receive at least ten chain letters a day in my e-mail and or mobile phones. But I have to admit it to you that none of those letters that I had forwarded. Yeah, am not so much for those (am sorry, this was a hundred percent according to my naïve opinion) stupid things, but, before I start my joke about it, let me talk about what is chain letter mean literally.
A typical chain letter consists of a message that attempts to induce the recipient to make a number of copies of the letter and then pass them on to as many recipients as possible. Common methods used in chain letters include emotionally manipulative stories, get-rich-quick pyramid schemes, and the exploitation of superstition to threaten the recipient with bad luck or even physical violence or death if he or she "breaks the chain" and refuses to adhere to the conditions set out in the letter.
In the United States, chain letters that request money or other items of value and promise a substantial return to the participants (like the infamous Make Money Fast scheme) are considered a form of gambling and therefore illegal. Other types of chain letters are viewed as a general nuisance in that frequently multiplying letters clog up the postal system and do not function as correspondence mail, but rather, a game. Some colleges and military bases have passed regulations stating that in the private mail of college students and military personnel, respectively, chain letters are not authorized and will be thrown out. However, it is often difficult to distinguish chain letters from genuine correspondence. So don’t blame me if am so not into this phenomenon whatsoever. It’s not that I don’t want to help anyone that they said needed help in those letters, I just can not trust it whether it was a real thing or not. So when someone sent me this e-mail which (I don’t know if it’s true) originally came from Billy Connolly, a British comedian, I was like, no way, I have to blog about this. It was so freaking funny! Read this e-mail bellow and don’t tell that you didn’t laugh your head off…Well, if you didn't, that means that you do not understand British humor!

Hello, my name is Billy and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe, if you send them on, a poor six-year-old girl in Scotland with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a traveling freak show.

And, do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give $1000 to you, and everyone to whom you send 'his' email?


How stupid are we?


Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by a super model I just happen to run into the next day!


What a bunch of utter bullshit.


Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and sodomise me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by St Peter in 5AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrim stowaways on the Endeavour.

Fuck 'em!!


If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the 'send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being' forwards about 90 times.

I don't fucking care.


Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our own unpopularity.


The point being?


If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.
If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the arse of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this email. Now forward this to everyone you know.. Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.

Have a nice day.


Billy Connolly

PS. Send me 15 bucks and then fuck off
.

^_^

Monday, December 7, 2009

Inglorious Bastards

Oh no, don’t get me wrong…I am a very proud Indonesian. I was born and grew up in this beautiful place. But what am going to write now is about the fact of our beloved country that I can not just ignored like it was nothing wrong. Here is the thing, for the past eight and a half years, my sweet little dog had played on the street of my neighborhood once in a while and nothing was wrong with that. I felt so secure as it was a housing complex which was secluded and supposed to be very safe. Beside, my dog was a very famous in the neighborhood as every time I went for a walk with him, more people said ‘hello’ to him rather than to me, that how cute and lovable my dog was. So yeah, don’t blame me if I never put my dog on leash as he was only a small dog who was never a threat to anyone. And for those eight and a half years period, I was never got any complained from anyone whatsoever for my dog behaviors. So, what went wrong?
I know for the past two years, rabies was started became an issue in Bali as I read on the big billboard down the traffic lights of the road just before the airport turning. So yeah, as a dog owner I aware of that but it was never became a big thing to me as my dog was fully vaccinated. Then why, when I was doing my shopping trip in Singapore last week, someone just cold bloodedly murdered my lovely little baby with those poisons that normally used to kill street dogs who were rabies suspected? And no, this wasn’t happened far away from my house but right in front of it as my maid found my dog’s body laid underneath mango tree inside of our villa compound’s area with his mouth full of foams. Looked like he was trying to run back to the house to get help but it was too late. My poor little buddy died without me by his side, leaving me with such a huge regret to deal with. I was so devastating, I was like hysterical when I got the phone called from my maid telling me what happened. Seriously guys, how do you deal with such as situation? This thing was my best buddy for a very long time, a loyal one. He followed me everywhere I go, even slept with me at night, wait for me on my bathroom door while am having a shower, yeah…I don’t ever see the day where he wasn’t around me for these past eight and a half years. Ever! So go figure how it makes me feel?
Back to my point, I was like having so many questions in my head for the authority to answer. Like, who is responsible for a tragedy like this? Seriously, how could someone, in any excuse no matter what, mistaken my dog with any kind of rabies or dangerous dog? Just because he was unleashed? He was playing in front of his own house, for God sake! And he was wearing a collar with his name and my phone number tagged on it. Don’t you think that you guys, whoever you are, went too far on this rabies matter? I still see so many street dogs else where, but why started on a secure and secluded area where rabies was never been an issue yet? Or, if you think it was the right thing to do, don’t you think that at least people who lives in the area has a right to know that you were going to mass murder any dogs on the street? So that they are aware? My vet tried to talked to the authority once, and guess what answer that she got? They were like, oh yeah…of course you were objected, you’ve been paid by westerner! Come on, people…what kind of answer was that? So uneducated! This has got nothing to do with westerner whatsoever!
That night, after finished arranging my dog’s cremation at the clinic and went home, I found a cat laid on street in front of my house because of the same cause, poison. He was accompanied by other cat who was sat down there meow for a help, but it was too late. What a sad scene to watch, if I were you. What would you call that? Collateral damage? Why don’t you cleaned up the street from whatever you used to killed those innocent animals afterwards? And yeah, don’t we have another non barbaric way to deal with such as situation? I am totally aware how dangerous rabies is, but it doesn’t give us a right to kill every dogs that we’ve seen hang out on the street. Not all of street dogs are dangerous and have rabies, we can see the different…but of course, that was if we care enough to hire someone competent to do the job, not just any idiot who willing to do anything for a penny. I was just adopted a street dog, I named her Coco, who went missing at the same day with the day they murdered my dog. My guts telling me that the same thing was happened to her as they were playing outside together on that time. But my maid looked all over the place around my neighborhood and found nothing. She was like disappear, just like that. Some people told me that someone probably took her for food. Yeah, like eating her. I was like, what the…? How cruel are we as a human being to do such thing? And we were not even in any emergency situation, like if we were stranded in the middle of nowhere and have no other choice. NO, we’re not. So, what is wrong with you people? If this was true, then yeah…I was ashamed to be Indonesian! Get civilized you guys! If we were angry when other country said that we were under developed, then why are you act like one? Maybe you think you are a winner by killing all of those innocent animals, but what kind of winning was that if you got it ingloriously?
^_^

To my lovely baby, RIP...you will always be my number one as I always said and promised you...

To the 'Inglorious Bastards' who killed my babies, I pity you for done such cruelty like that, for having a heart to kill innocent pets, mine in particular!

Thursday, December 3, 2009

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